10/22/08

Sixteen new guys came in a couple of days ago. Sixteen guys iwth different stores and with different ways of doing their time.

Some guys are transferring from higher security institutions (FCI USP, etc…) to finish up thir 10 to 20 year sentences; and some guys spending their first moments in federal custody.  The latter of which stand out dramatically.

The glaze over far away looks that they have not yet learned to conceal.  The timidity in the way the move about & hold themselves even the seemingly tougher ones.  Their ability to sleep all day and night for now.

I asked my bunky if I looked that out of place when I shoed up here and he laughed profusely (which I took as a yes)…

…he actually laughed for quite a long time (which I took as an emphatic yes!)

Joe – 10/22/2008

October 7, 2008

I have tried to write an update several times, but I have not been able to finish any of them.  So here I go again.

 I have been in a “funk”, sort of a lingering low grade depression since Suzanne passed away in August.  Even though I know that she is happier and more fulfilled now than at any othe rtime in her life.

I had just received a letter from her saying that she was out of the hospital and recovering at home.  Classic Suzanne.  Full of silliness, love and encouragement.  I read it at least a dozen times.  Hope and Joy filled me in a way that I almost forgot it could.  One of my biggest concerns about being here suddenly relieved.  I would laugh and dance with Suzanne again!

Then came the painfujl new.  Wendy told me that Suzanne had passed away when she came to visit me on the weekend.  Prison is a cold and sterile place that is pretty unresponsive to pain and suffering.  Its stubborn indifference only serving to intensify your sorrows until you finally give in and become indifferent as well.

For now I am refusing to become indifferent or otherwise hardened to the pain and sorrow that abound here.  Not just mine I am extremely blessed in comparison to many of my new peers but to the collective voices of lament that can be heard in the awkward silences and bouts of feigned laughter that are both so common here.

At the same time I rejoice.  I marvel at how Jesus must have welcomed Suzanne into paradise. I imagine her excitement as she is reunited with some true cancer survivors that she lost touch with for a while.   Then then burst into tears of joy as I think about that moment Suzanne pauses to realize that her pain and suffering are over forever!  Although I am in no hurry to die I have one more reason why I can’t wait to get to heaven!!

Jesus I give thanks for the hope tha tyou gave Suzanne.  The hope that you give me and the hope that you offer to all who read my meager ramblings…

Joe

Rules for Visitation

RULES FOR VISITATION:
1. NO SWEATS
2. NO SHORTS
3. NO TANK TOPS
 
I would suggest wearing Jeans.  After I had to run to Walmart and get some pants I was harrased a little about having Khaki’s on.  If you wear jeans there will be no confusion.
4. No wallets
5. No cell phones
6. The only thing you can bring in is your ID and money for the vending machines for food.  They have sandwiches, snacks and drinks in the visiting room.
 

Visitation hours start at 9:00am.  Plan on being there by 8:30am.  If you don’t get in at 9:00am you can come back at 10:00 am or later after the lockdown and campers have been counted. 

Once you enter Sheridan FCI you will pull up to a phone and stop your car.  On the phone you should tell them you’re visiting Joe and they’ll check for his name then permit you to go ahead.   The camp is easy to find it’s on the left and it is the set of buildings without all the razor wire.

Sept 13th 2008 – My Visit to Joe

I apologize for taking so long to get this out.  It has been a crazy few weeks.
 
On Sept 13th I went and visited Joe. Our good friend Jon joined me on the trip.  We had a really good visit with Joe.  As you would expect it’s difficult for Joe on a daily basis.  We all know Joe and he is very good at making the best of every situation and I know he’s doing that at the camp.  This however is different since every day he is separated from his wife and children.  I don’t know how you can put a silver lining on this situation. 
 
When you arrive at the camp you first come to a phone where you are required to stop and turn off your car and then pick up the phone to notifiy the camp you are visiting Joe.  They will of course check his name and then clear you to go through.  It’s pretty easy to figure out where to go next since on the right are buildings with tons of razor wire and fence surrounding them.  On the left is the camp which is not protected by anything.   You should plan on arriving before 9am. I would suggest getting there early though since the line is long and it takes time to clear every visitor.    After you are cleared you enter a big room which is like a cafeteria with tables and chairs.   Joe should already know you’re coming.  If you plan on visiting Joe please let Wendy or myself know so we can notify Joe next time we talk to him.  He’ll be waiting at a table for you.  THis was a little different for me since I had to make a mad dash to walmart.  Read the previous blog entry on what happened here.
 
Joe looks good.  He excercises daily.  He said he’s running about 3 miles / day.  He is doing a lot of reading so he can keep his mind away from thinking about his family.  Wendy mentioned to me that Joe is reading 1 book / day.  I guess that’s what 11 or 12 hours of free time will do for you. 
 
Jon and I had a really nice visit with Joe.  You could tell he really appreciated us being there.  Every since then I have thought about Joe more and more just because I know he needs all of us more than ever.  I encourage all of you to make time to go visit Joe.  Not only will you get to see him in person you will also really see where’s he at and this will undoubtably make an impact on you as it did to me.  We can’t all go every weekend but if all of use visit him every one to two months then there will be someone visiting him every weekend. 
 
We chatted about all sorts of things which I can’t remember specifics but it was just like see Joe and visiting him before except the location of course.  I do remember a few things.  He basically has a cubicle type space with a bed.  It’s the size of 10 x 20 tiles that you normally see in schools on the floor.  He has a place to lock up his belongings and this is his space. 
 
We did talk about his beliefs and how that fits into his environment.  It is definitely a mission field there.  I know Joe is going to have an impact on many lives while being there as he does with everyone he comes in contact with.
 
I hope this is enough to keep you updated. Heres a few items of clarification when going to vist since I had to learn some of these the hard way.    You can read my blog post on http://joelavin.wordpress.com about that adventure.
 
RULES FOR VISITATION:
1. NO SWEATS
2. NO SHORTS
3. NO TANK TOPS
 
I would suggest wearing Jeans.  After I had to run to Walmart and get some pants I was harrased a little about having Khaki’s on.  If you wear jeans there will be no confusion.
4. No wallets
5. No cell phones
6. The only thing you can bring in is your ID and money for the vending machines for food.  They have sandwiches, snacks and drinks in the visiting room.
 
 
BOOKS, BOOKS, BOOKS
 
Joe can use all the books we send.  As I mentioned he is reading quite a few so let’s keep this coming.  I have posted a link to his amazon wishlist on the right side of the blog.  If you want to send him stuff personally you can send paperback books, magazines.  Remember however that these could get returned if they’re not deemed appropriate.  For example I asked Joe about MMA magazines. He said they’re ok as long as they don’t show any fight moves. Of course finding an MMA magazine without moves and without bikini clad women is a bit difficult.  I guess I’ll stick to sending him stuff from the web.   Probably an article heavy magazine would be best.  He is getting the financial times daily already. 
 
Hard cover books have to be send by the retailer such as Amazon.  If you go to http://joe-lavin.com there are links to the wishlist there.
 
I hope I’ve covered it all.  As usual this will all be on the blog at http://joelavin.wordpress.com
 
Thanks
 
Kevin

After all my ranting and raving I didn’t talk about Joe

I ranted about my adventure at Walmart yet didn’t mention anything about the visit.

Here it goes..

 I went and visted Joe 2 weeks ago on Sept 13th.  It was sure good to see him.  He looks good.  Our friend Jon joined as as well.  We had a great visit with Joe.  We spent close to 4 hours talking and hearing all about what it’s like to be there.  As you can imagine it is torture for Joe every day to be away from his family.  He tries to keep his mind occupied with as much as possible so he doesn’t have to think about it as much.  I could tell that Joe really enjoyed having Jon and I visit him.  I have thought about Joe every day after visiting him and how much he needs his friends and family.  Wendy, Joes mom and the kids have gone down farily regularly to see Joe.  I’m glad they are able to do this.  I know it’s hard since it is a fair amount of driving for one day added to all the other things going on.   I encourage all of you to go visit Joe as much as you can.  He needs us more than ever and I don’t want us to ever forget about Joe and Wendy in our busy chaotic lives which don’t even come close to what Joe is going through.   Speaking of Wendy we can’t forget about her and Maddy either.  I know a bunch of Joe & Wendy’s friends all committed to being there for Wendy and Maddy.  We can’t forget the committment we made to Joe to be there for his family.  I hope I’m not being preachy. This message is for me as well.  It has been so easy for me to get caught up in my life and forget about this.

 

So way back the first week I wrote about the funny story of the car Joe rode in to the camp.  Well here it is. Sorry it took so long.