May 28 – Serious Irony (or at least zemblanity)

So, at this point, I am obviously trying to learn everything I can about the prison designation process. As I am reading through one of the many articles on the subject I realize that I have come to somewhat of an interesting discovery. Now at the risk of sounding a little bit flippant, but for the benefit of a truly wonderful example of irony, what I have discovered is that there is a semi-secret formula that is calculated by one office for every Federal Prison in the entire United States. The office is located in the pretty small Texas town of Grand Prairie (about 10% of the population of Dallas).

Now here is the irony; one of the biggest things going on in that small town for the last several years has been the Wildflower Resort and Golf Courses; the real estate development project that has become the bane of my existence and the center of my legal troubles. The Federal BOP Designation and Sentence Computation Center is just about 10 miles from the development site. The development is constantly in the paper there, and unfortunately I have even made the paper there personally.

I believe there are over 10,000 cities & towns in America and over 3.5 million square miles, so figure the odds on these two places being less than 15 miles apart! However, I doubt my recent change in designated security levels has much, if anything, to do with all of this. It is just something that struck me as at least interesting fodder for the day. 

May 20 – Definitely, Maybe, For Sure….

After getting several different answers, from several different people, I have been asked to believe another oral representation that even though my designation letter states that I have been designated to spend my confinement at Sheridan Federal Correctional Institution (FCI); in reality I am supposed to report to the Federal Detention Center (FDC) at Sheridan where I will be processed and evaluated and then transferred to the FCI where I will be evaluated/watched some more and then when (if?) it is determined that it is appropriate I will be transferred to the Satellite Prison Camp (SPC) for the remainder of my time. 

What this means, I am not actually sure. In the end, I am spending the same amount of time away from my family and friends, which is by far the most painful part of my sentence. As long as I am as close to them as possible and I have similar opportunities to talk to them on the phone (300 minutes/month) or have them visit me (approx 6 visits/month) I will choose to feel blessed and look for ways to improve myself and help others while I am there. Which is easy to say and think out here, so my prayers are that I can maintain these desires on my worst day inside whatever prison I end up at.

May 15 – More Promises Broken

I have done the best I can to make this little journal as neutral as possible and to not spend time in here complaining about what has happened or defending myself against a myriad of accusations. However, I may have reached a point where that is no longer important to me.

I received a letter today telling me that I had been officially designated to the higher security prison in Sheridan, Oregon for my confinement instead of the Low Security Camp across the street. This is not only something else that is much different from what was “promised” to me, it was probably the biggest thing that was emphasized when I was being “convinced” by the government to agree to enter a plea agreement. I was told that if I went to trial they would come after me with a vengeance and once I lost (a foregone conclusion in their mind) that I would spend much, much more time in prison, but that did not matter as much as the fact that I would spend it in an actual prison instead of a Low Security Camp. I was told that a year in a camp is far better then a week in a Federal Correction Institution, especially for a “guy like me”.

How far does somebody “like me” have to actually go before I know what it means to have Jesus and nothing more, and know that that is enough?

May 1 – Parenting From Behind The Wall

I have been looking for any ideas or links to information that I can personally do to love and support my family while I am detained, but I have not been able to find very much at all. I have looked within the system, various prisoner support groups and on the Internet and I cannot find a single, simple and thorough collection of ideas.

So hopefully I can start one that I can use and that will eventually become a catalyst for a conversation that should be taking place in every nook and cranny of the penal system. I am initially trying to think of things (from silly to stupendous) that I can do or prepare before reporting and those I can do while I am serving my time.  I imagine that this will expand into what I can do to be the best parent I can after I am released from prison as well as to how I can love my wife before, during and after as well.

If you’re reading this and have any ideas that you would like to share, please send them to me at calicodog@gmail.com so that I can add them to my list.

Here is what I have come up with so far…PDF Document